Have you ever woke up in the morning and eyes wide open but its as if the soul has left the body because you can't make the body get up no matter how hard you try. so you just lay there on the bed looking blankly at the walls until the body decides it want to move out from the bed? I do. I went through it this morning. Just staring at the wall for a few hours until I can't take it anymore. The body need to use the toilet. Then I took my bath after a smoke, submitted my assignments, settled my internet connection, enquire about my school fees, talk to some aunties who was working the the campus and then here I am again. In front of the internet. The lecturers have realized the fact that I won't be attending their classes regularly so they won't be bothering me that much in the future. I just can't leave this room to face the class. I feel as if the whole class is staring at me and backstabbing me. Paranoid I am. I just want to spend alone time with myself in my own room. I don't want to meet people. I get tired after a conversation or two. It takes too much effort to be jolly and happy. Really. It does. I don't have much appetite to eat today, I ate a few packets of crackers and a vitagen. I'll try to have something for dinner or supper so that I won't get gastric attack. I'm lost. Today is my sister's birthday and I wish her happiness and wealth. Loving her everyday always. I'm going to take a nap now. Will be up at 10 or 11pm. I hope.